Spacefem (spacefem) wrote,

Upcoming Reunion

Can we talk about high school reunions?

My 20th is coming up. I blew off my 10th high school reunion because I had stuff to do, but really I could’ve made it back if it was important, or if I wanted to be there. Let’s face it, I didn’t.

This year I actually noticed the date, asked a friend about it, and he invited me to a Facebook group where it’s all been in the works. I scroll through the list of names and recognized a few but not tons, but just seeing the list filled me with this anxiety and dread and I have no idea why. I feel fine about how I’ve done in my life, I’m not worried about what people are thinking of me, I never worry about what people are thinking of me. But I didn’t high school! Maybe that’s why I have so much anxiety, I worry that I’m gonna some have regression back. It was a very isolating time. I keep hearing that everybody feels that way. There’s this “Mortified” podcast that I love, it features grown adults reading their journals from high school. Everybody sounds equally confused, isolated, over-analytical - and laughs about it. It makes me feel better. but not enough.

This is just one of those ways where I wish I could turn my brain off and relax because everybody else posting in the facebook group sounds really excited to just hang out, have a beer, and catch up.

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