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livejournal friends, I've taken it upon myself to bring back the feminist community.

because it was good for me, in my early life, very good. and because it's obvious that there are still feminists on livejournal everywhere! heck just on my friends list, like 70 people said they were interested in feminism... I didn't even think that many people read my livejournal! so it pains me that livejournal has no feminist community. Also unlike others I'm in, I don't even think feminist was killed by generic livejournal death - I think it was ontd_feminism that did it. it got really popular, so people kinda started ignoring the classic feminism Q&A in favor of debating katy perry quotes.

so I have a slow plan to put up some shareable feminist q&a memes and see if it works.

here's today's:

Inspired by Bioethics professor Alice Dreger live tweeting her kid’s abstinence/fear-based sex education class, how was sex ed where you went to school? Why do you think comprehensive sex ed is so important?

This topic is actually quite dear to my heart.

In the early 2000s I started up this website called advicenators where people would ask for advice. the idea was that everyone was an advice columnist, you got your own page with questions you'd picked and your answers, you could pick the colors and everything.

It got really popular among young teens. when it kinda "hit big" we suddenly had 10,000 and then 20,000 and then 30,000 active users, and that's when I pulled away from the project and actually gave my site away to another coder... but that's another story.

The thing is with all the teen users, we had a lot of sex & contraceptive questions. How can you not get pregnant, could I be pregnant, "I heard that you can't get pregnant if..." sorts of things.

and it really demonstrated to me that in the absence of comprehensive sex ed, kids can and WILL make shit up. And they will take to heart whatever their friends make up. Very few humans in the history of the world ever said, "I haven't been properly educated on the details of sex, so I guess I'd just better not ever have it."

hell, now that I'm a parent I see it's the same with everything. your toddler will walk and talk. you don't teach them this. some toddlers try and walk long before they're coordinated enough to catch themselves when they fall, so they end up with very bruised foreheads. luckily the bruises heal up pretty quick and there's no permanent or life-altering experiences as a result of this trial and error.

I was taught everything I wanted to know about sex, and was still very responsible about it, I was at least 18 or 19 before I had sex and then it was only in committed long term relationships, I was on the birth control pill and using condoms. So I am living proof that sex ed does not turn every 14 year old into some kind of crazy slutbot. And even if it does, shit people, it's sex, we need to get over some of the bullshit issues we have with it.

sex ed sex ed sex ed. in public schools. for everyone. the data supports it, logic supports it, everyone deserves it.


Posts from This Journal by “feminism” Tag


( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
Apr. 17th, 2015 03:49 pm (UTC)
Since I am older than dirt, sex ed. when I was in school was extremely sexist. Phamplets about 'showing interest in what a boy likes', and getting your period. Really. I always wondered if the boys got phamplets about 'showing interest in what the girl likes', and I would say wet dreams, but I'm sure I wasn't aware they existed back then. The amount of misinformation passed around school was astonishing, too, now that I look back on it. I blame the Puritans. Sex is fun. Fun is bad, therefore sex is bad. God, people are stupid.
Apr. 17th, 2015 04:00 pm (UTC)
Great you started the community!! Surprised there wasn't one! Thank you!

It pains me that this day and age we are still sticking with abstinence only "education". Of course, that's still a big step forward to where I come from where it's NEVER even brought up, it's just understood that YOU DON'T DO IT or your whole family name will be destroyed/shamed, and especially for girls, it will bring your world to an end. sigh. It's horrible - it has led to so much abuse, so much violence, so much sadness for boys and girls.

I left India when I was 12. Went to an international school in Rome, the HQ of Catholic Church. And at 13 years of age, we were given an extensive education about sex & drugs. We had one class where boys and girls were separated and one class where we were in the same class. We were shown graphics of everything. The teachers were great! There were no opinions of what they thought was right or wrong. It was information and they facilitated open discussions. I can tell you it was that class that kept me away from drugs, smoking. I was 20 before I even considered sex because I knew what it can entail.

It should be definitely included in every school's curriculum. All options. It's education & knowledge. And that's what schools are supposed to provide.

ETA: and my classmates experimented earlier and that was fine too. They knew and understood how to do it safely and what the consequences were, etc. I'd much rather that than this abstinence only "education"

Edited at 2015-04-17 04:59 pm (UTC)
Apr. 17th, 2015 04:27 pm (UTC)
Apr. 17th, 2015 04:46 pm (UTC)
...and I didn't notice it was the same author as the livetweets :)
Apr. 17th, 2015 05:25 pm (UTC)
Sad, I went to a catholic school, taught by nuns and brothers, the whole serious catholic thing, and we had sex ed. Videos, talks and very very detailed discussions, the nuns talked more than most cosmo articles. I started having sex at 16, but I was on the pill - paid for by my parents - and I was open about wanting it. I was responsible for my refills and making my appointments. But, I did make my b/f go with me when we decided we were going to have sex, and he had to be there for the conversation with my mom about going on the pill. I am happy I did it, and have no regrets about having sex at 16.
Apr. 18th, 2015 01:52 am (UTC)
I genuinely don't understand how people think sex education classes make teenagers want to have sex. That's like saying that driving safety classes make kids want to drive. If anything, safety classes take some of the glamour out of things the kids want to do anyway.

In any case, watching my 60-year-old teacher show how you could put a condom around her entire arm did not turn me on.
Apr. 18th, 2015 11:49 am (UTC)
Sex education should start way before the kid is even in school, like the first time she asks something about it. Maybe there should be classes for parents to teach them to stop being so afraid to talk to their kids about sex. I remember my niece asking my sister and me what an orgasm was when she overheard us talking. She was seven or eight at the time. Since she already knew about sex, the hardest part of the discussion was trying to describe an orgasm.
Apr. 18th, 2015 11:28 pm (UTC)
I feel like that community died partially from groupthink...anytime someone said something that wasn't one hundred percent white upper middle class feminist approved people got very mean, very quickly. jmho.
Apr. 19th, 2015 04:04 am (UTC)
So do you have ownership of the community now? From what I remember when it imploded, the previous moderators were...not good, is one way of putting it.
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )

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