Log in

No account? Create an account

Previous Entry | Next Entry

Spacefem's guide to second baby gifts

So I'm having a second baby in ONE MONTH and my friends are actually going to throw a little dinner out for me, which is shocking and really sweet of them, especially since you all know I haven't been the most supportive person when it comes to baby showers. I do send gifts, yes, but I complain a lot if the showers get too long or painful, and I have sent gifts without attending them just because I can't stand the awfulness. I go through cycles: I'll willingly attend a few, then a bad one hits and I'm boycotting again, then I feel bad.

I went to one a few months ago where they made us play FOUR painfully stupid games before we got any cake. That's total crap.

And I have definitely ranted against people feeling like we should give big ticket gifts all over again because the family is having a baby of a different sex. I'm sorry, if you were idiot enough to buy your swing, carseat, playpen, nursery decor and 87 outfits in pepto-bismol pink the first time around, that baby brother is just going to have to deal.

But I digress. I'm not having a shower since we don't need big stuff, but everyone wants to hang out and bring me a few little things because "every baby deserves to be celebrated", even a second baby. I was the oldest in my family so this revelation has been a surprise for me, my younger sister was actually the first to point out that baby sisters are important and deserve new stuff too. Go figure. We have already bought this baby a brand new stroller, rocking chair, and cosleeper, because with the first one we tried to be as cheap as possible and learned the hard way that sometimes you get what you pay for... I figured we were set. But the more I think about it and there is a list of stuff we will need for this kid, because lots of normal baby stuff just doesn't last through multiple babies - by design, not because we're cheap! And I decided to post the list up here in case anyone else is every wanting to celebrate a second baby, you'll know what us un-new parents need... it was a longer list than I thought, to tell the truth. Without further adieu:

Stuff that gets used up
Diapers - duh
Soap - and some would mention lotion, but I have summer babies when the air is humid so we never used lotion. Unfortunately I got enough at my first shower to moisturize an army of babies... it went into donation bins.
First aid - like baby tylenol
Washclothes, and maybe even towels, they're so thin they totally wear out
Socks - I still wish there was a baby sock subscription service where they just send new ones in the correct size to your house every week. Between being outgrown and just vanishing into thin air, there are never enough socks

Stuff your first kid drooled on, or otherwise just made gross
Baby bottle nipples
Sensory Books - Even my own mom always said: Every baby needs her own "Pat The Bunny"
Those nose sucker things - Marc and I call it "the schnozelator". Who wants to re-use those? Ewe.
Burp cloths
Spoons with the silicon outsides that get gnawed on

Celebrating a family's transitions
Scrapbooking supplies or a baby book
Picture frames
Books about older sibling-dom for the other kid

Stuff new moms need
Tucks/witch hazel pads
Ice packs
Dermoplast numbing spray - in the blue can
Breast pads - holy crap, why does milk have to come in with a VENGANCE when all you've got is a tiny sleepy four day old?!
Milk storage bags for heading back to work

And finally... the last "second baby" shower I went to I knew for FACT that the mom had way too many friends and family members giving her stuff, because I was at her first shower! So rather than add to the pyramid of diapers I made a charitable contribution... in her case, I went to the alternative gifts international site and made a donation to Hugging Grannies, to help get bus tickets to volunteers willing to provide personal contact to Chinese orphans. I also love Doctors Without Borders and other organizations helping improve the status of maternal health around the world, but since I'm already monthly donor there I didn't know how I could make it look any more "gift-y". And if you're looking to go local, you can't beat a donation to Planned Parenthood - I can't think of a better way to celebrate the uterus that's bringing a baby into this world than to support an organization that's all about women's reproductive rights and care.

So that's my list, it's simple, lots of small cheap things so you can take part in this new life without making it another Ode to American Materialism. I will gladly take suggestions too, I'm sure I can add to the list and make it perfectly complete for everyone.



( 11 comments — Leave a comment )
Apr. 9th, 2013 12:19 am (UTC)
doesn't the hospital give you one of those nose-sucky-thingies when you have the baby? Ours did...
Apr. 9th, 2013 11:55 am (UTC)
mine did too, but I put it on the list just in case.

also the one the hospital gave us was not the kind with the little flap you can open to clean it out really well. it was just huge, and blue. now, it was way more powerful than the one we got from the store, bigger and sturdier for maximum efficiency. so we used both depending on our needs.
Apr. 9th, 2013 12:28 am (UTC)

This made me LOL: "'m sorry, if you were idiot enough to buy your swing, carseat, playpen, nursery decor and 87 outfits in pepto-bismol pink the first time around, that baby brother is just going to have to deal."

I think baby showers are fun but I've never been to one with stupid games, just with lots of really good food.

Apr. 9th, 2013 11:54 am (UTC)
hell, my circle sucks then, I've seen no good food at the recent showers I've been at! cake, cookies, some butter mints... that's it. where are the tortillas with cream cheese and olives rolled up in them, dammit.
Apr. 9th, 2013 01:11 pm (UTC)
That's so sad! When my friends have them, they're feasts with no stupid games! I've only been to like 4 though... LOL
Apr. 9th, 2013 02:03 am (UTC)
I get something other than lanolin. My nipples get sore over the first few days (no matter how great latch is) and the sticky lanolin makes my skin crawl to apply. this one is a good brand in general.

Also, I hate pads for weeks as this heal up. When I'm in bed with baby, I often lie down on a chux pad without a bottom on.

Edited at 2013-04-09 02:05 am (UTC)
Apr. 9th, 2013 11:51 am (UTC)
oh man I went through lanolin like crazy, loved the stuff the whole time I was nursing! I put it on every time before I pumped because it helped the attachments work better.

Now, I did have someone recommend these "soothie" things you put in the fridge then stick to yourself and they were miserable... I had to peel them off me like band-aids. but some moms love them. to each her own, I guess.

anyway... afterease, I read the description and still don't understand what it is or what it's for. it just says "use two drops in water". is it for your breasts?
Apr. 10th, 2013 02:54 am (UTC)
Coconut oil works fabulously for pumping. Coconut oil before pumping, lanolin after.

Don't forget to call your insurance and find out if they cover a new breastpump or accessories. Under Obamacare most insurance has to cover some type of pump as "durable medical equipment" and some cover a certain amount of milk storage bags and pump accessory pieces. It seems to vary widely though. I don't know what my insurance would have covered, it didn't kick in until January this year and I was already pump weaning at that point and didn't need another pump.

Apr. 9th, 2013 06:48 am (UTC)
I would say new bottles for baby & pacifiers if you are going to use them. Also, maybe some new breast pump parts like tubing.
Apr. 9th, 2013 11:52 am (UTC)
oh, totally adding those to the list! bottle nipples definitely wear out and nobody wants a used pacifier, ewe!
Apr. 9th, 2013 04:24 pm (UTC)
Hi! I am not sure when you added me, my friends list has been stagnant for so long, I haven't checked it in months. I have added you back, you come well-recommended by Ali.

I am due with #3 (first two were twins) in June and haven't even begun to think about what we need. I just keep thinking, surely we already have it all, in duplicate? But I know that's not really true. Thanks for the jumpstart on a list!
( 11 comments — Leave a comment )

Latest Month

August 2018
Powered by LiveJournal.com
Designed by Tiffany Chow