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boy or girl time

I'm hitting 19 weeks in the next few days and going in for the big mid-point ultrasound where most pregnant women are glowing because "ZOMG FINALLY IT'S BOY OR GIRL TIME!" so I'm trying to be like that too... but deep down inside, of course I'm scared to death because this is the point where you find out things like "oops, your baby forgot to grow a liver and won't survive outside the womb past three hours but it's Kansas so thou shalt carry to term" or "oops, your baby died two weeks ago and you couldn't tell" or stuff like that.  This is what I think about all the time.  I am the least happy pregnant woman I have ever met.

The funny thing about my obsession is that at 12 weeks when I had that hemorrhage and got to see more of my own blood come out of me than I'd ever seen in my life, I was oddly resigned and okay with the fact that the baby was gone.  Why was I so calm knowing I'd lost the baby, but when I found out the baby was okay it was back to my freaking out about losing the baby?  My brain just proved that it could totally deal with that situation!

So okay moving on... I'm trying to focus on the fun "see the baby" aspect of the scan, my brain wants to think about scary shit but I work to wander off that and try really hard to make myself want a boy or a girl, act like that's important, just for the distraction of it.

In a way it's kinda important only because Marc and I have kind of a bet going on. Well, we haven't figured out what to bet, but we're both pretty dead set in our feelings:

I think this baby is a boy.  If I could choose I'd rather have a boy, I think I have a good name picked out, it would be a nice balance, that brain development book said that boy/girl brains have even fewer differences when they grow up together as siblings, it was interesting.  Not that sex drives a ton of brain differences anyway, not nearly as much as we do with our training, but there are subtle trends they find and it's all kinda fun to read up on.  Oh but anyway, I also think it's a boy because this pregnancy has just been so different, absolutely no symptoms in the first weeks (with Josie I was so hungry and my boobs hurt and all that) and I was so much sicker this time... it's gotten way better lately but holy crap.  With Josie I threw up once.  ONCE!  With this one, even if you throw out the food poisoning incident, I had days and days where every morning I'd just lose it for no reason.  Had to stop working out and brushing my teeth, had crackers and cookies in every room of the house (Josie loved it, it was like an easter egg hunt), generally felt like ass for like two months.

Marc thinks the baby is a girl.  He wants a girl, just so he can "stick with what he knows".  He points out that I was "so sure" Josie was a boy, I had boy dreams and everything when I was pregnant with her, she came out very much a girl. He also thinks that since he's made two girls, there just isn't evidence that he's got any Y-chromosome sperm.  This is impossible since he is a man so obviously there's a Y in there someplace, they just haven't won any races yet.

I looked it up and according to this website he's partially right.  Overall in the world, 51% of babies born are boys (you be the judge of why nature gives us slightly more, I won't say it's because guys are kinda dumb and prone to removing yourselves from the gene pool, but some might think that, just sayin').  But if you've already had two girls, you only have a 46% chance of having a boy for #3. Still pretty close to 50/50, but not quite.

Anyway to get you all thinking about this instead of worrying about the millions of worst-case scenarios that run through my head every day, how about a fun poll? No "other" option, if we don't get to find out this week (or my worst-case-scenario is right) this turns into a "the next live birth spacefem experiences will result in a..." sort of poll.

Poll #1883877 boy or girl?

it's a...



( 14 comments — Leave a comment )
Dec. 9th, 2012 01:18 pm (UTC)
Marc has made *two* girls?
Dec. 9th, 2012 05:18 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I was wondering about that too lol
Dec. 10th, 2012 12:01 am (UTC)
Dec. 9th, 2012 09:07 pm (UTC)
Here's why I said girl. I know that genetically speaking (I am a sperm expert so I should) that the odds are ~50/50. However with the trending I'm seeing among people I know of who are pregnant, girl seems to be what hits trend. Everyone I know (or know of) expecting their first are expecting boys. Everyone I know of who is expecting their second are having the same sex as their first.
Dec. 9th, 2012 11:03 pm (UTC)
I had opposite symptoms from you, but my 2nd pregnancy was different from my first too, so I had a feeling baby was a boy. With my daughter, I threw up more, but with my son I just felt a lot more nauseous and only threw up a few times. I was also a lot more tired the second time around, but that may be due to chasing around a toddler. 1st time I didnt't really have any cravings, but with my son, I wanted soda and sugar all the time.
Dec. 10th, 2012 12:02 am (UTC)
Picked boy for the hell of it :)
Dec. 10th, 2012 01:03 am (UTC)
totally random choice but I said boy. We'll see! Hope everything goes smoothly!
Dec. 10th, 2012 01:37 am (UTC)
YES! I did make two girls. I have a daughter from a previous marriage.
Dec. 10th, 2012 05:10 am (UTC)
That makes sense, just making sure you two don't have a secret second (first) girl that you hide away in a basement haha.
Dec. 10th, 2012 02:10 am (UTC)
What's been the fetal heart rate at the times when it's been measured?
Dec. 10th, 2012 11:58 am (UTC)
In the 150s.

But I'm pretty sure any wives tales about that have been disproven :)
Dec. 11th, 2012 05:58 am (UTC)
LoL I'm going to go with girl anyway :P

Although the difference between pregnancies is leading me to choose otherwise!
Dec. 10th, 2012 02:54 pm (UTC)
I have heard that people are generally sicker with boys, and if my sister and SIL are any indication that rings true. They were both sicker than dogs for the first 3 months and both had boys. But I'm sure someone will have an anecdote that proves that wrong too. LOL
Dec. 12th, 2012 02:39 am (UTC)
Going with boy, just for the statistical hell of it.
( 14 comments — Leave a comment )

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