Spacefem (spacefem) wrote,

where am I, and why am I not a pilot?

Three months ago, I was four flights away from being a pilot. But it hasn't happened still and I'm so depressed. Seriously. Depressed.

Let's review our progress:
  • On November 30th, I completed my long solo cross-country to Emporia. That's when I was four flights away... one solo, one instructional flight, school checkout and checkride. In the bag, right? Pilot by Christmas, right?
  • On December 5th, I was blown out of my "one solo" due to wind restrictions, a half hour into it. I was miserable. But it's okay I can still be a pilot by Christmas, right?
  • On January 26th, I FINALLY GOT GOOD WEATHER FOR MY SOLO HOUR. And there were two instructor flights in between December 5 and Jan. 26th just so I could stay "recently experienced" enough to fly on my own at any time. But seriously... that's almost two months of not being able to solo. Sadness! Pilot by... Valentine's day?
  • On February 9th, I flew with my instructor and we both decided my skills were not checkride-worthy. Mostly because I only flew twice in January.
  • On February 18th, weather finally shaped up for us to get some practice. I also got some solo practice in on the 24th. Pilot by daylight savings?
  • On March 2nd, I went in for my final flight school checkout. They discovered that I was an hour short on instrument simulation.
  • On March 6th, I finished my hour.

Which brings us to this week... again, I'm ready for my last test, and what are we having? A solid week of rain, storms, and clouds. A week that's quickly stretching into ten days, maybe longer. There's nothing clear in the forecast... maybe Saturday, but this checkout I need is one that I can't do on a weekend, so if the one nice day falls on Saturday it's going to taunt me even more.

I hate this. I feel so hopeless. I'm faced with the idea that I will be a pilot for a month before grounded for medical restrictions... and at the rate I'm going, I'll be lucky to get that month. I know I've whined about flying lessons and how awful they all are, it's been a bitch of an adventure to read about because I'm always so down on everything. It's just really hard to keep my chin up this week.

Other things are happening... we're closing on the house in a week, I'm six months pregnant, marc has 2/3 of the apartment packed up to move, we're finishing the big work project we were on overtime for. Life is moving on and my pilot license goals are in slow-motion, no matter how bad I want it to move forward. Like something knocked out of my hand while I was walking with a fast, dense, crowd.

I was supposed to be a pilot by Christmas!
Tags: flying
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