Spacefem (spacefem) wrote,

pregnant women

Here are some things that piss me off about pregnant. I mean, a lot of the community is pretty good and I've learned some interesting things in the past few months being a member of it, especially since I don't interact with pregnant women very often at all. But other times I want to smack some ladies.

I just want to say that I have not read the community in several days, so if someone posted something, finds this and feels like I was writing JUST TO HER (which happens when you're a bit self-absorbed), that's my defense.

My least favorite topics are:

1) "Nesting"/nursery posts: They talk about having "nesting instincts kick in", as if they magically woke up to some scientifically proven need to decorate a nursery all cutesy. Instinct my ass... if you loved shopping before you were pregnant you're going to love shopping while you're pregnant. 95% of all women and at least 93% of men like buying stuff for their homes anyway... don't tell me it's an instinct. And by the way, you're probably buying too much crap anyway.

2) Along those same lines... inability to recognize that other people are still people. Yes it's amazing but non-pregnant people also get tired, hungry, sick, and (refer to item 1) like to shop. There are too many posts that make me wonder if the gal remembers life before pregnancy. You get these rants about how "my husband was too tired to refinish the floor in the nursery, well I'm the pregnant one!" Well, maybe the dude was tired? You know, it's all relative.

3) The non-stop worrying about Down Syndrome. There's no "perfect baby" test, but there is a Down Syndrome test, and I think its only purpose is to give pregnant women something to freak out about ("OMG they said my chances were .002% higher than average what should we DOOOO?"). I read up on the test and decided that it had a stupid false positive rate and could only really lead to more tests and skipped it. I can understand that some people in high risk situations really want to know their situation, but most couples get it because it's there and they want to feel comfy and they give no thought to what the results will mean to them because they figure it'll be just perfect. Is Down Syndrome even the worst thing ever, anyway? If your chances are 1/1000 and the test didn't exist, would you give it a second thought?

4) The non-stop worrying about determining the sex, and then making a huge deal about it. Okay, I admit it, I was way curious about whether I was having a boy or a girl... but once we found out what parts were on our little one I felt stupid for making such a big deal out of it. But even before that I was not a fan of the "team blue!" or "team pink!" posts. Is there a law that because your baby is coming equipped with a vagina, she's going to love pink? What do you think these organs are telling you about the person you're growing? What do you think you're getting, that you wouldn't have gotten with the other sex? Are you aware that sex and gender are different, and at any time your little one might not be so interested in equating his/her sex with a pre-determined society-accepted role? The only real reason I'm glad we learned our baby was a girl is that referring to her as "she" has been more comforting and personal then "it". But that's a defect of the english language.

5) Too many sonogram pictures. It might just be me but really I think they all look the same, and when the kid is born you can stare at it all you want. I totally can't relate to people who go to boutiques at the mall to get MORE sonogram because they just can't get enough. I enjoyed seeing our ultrasounds, found it scientifically interesting, but there's still something creepy and alien about it and it's nothing compared to a real baby.

So what do you think, am I a bad community member or what?
Tags: most commented, pregnancy
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