Spacefem (spacefem) wrote,

when it isn't funny anymore

Every time I find a company that looks fun to work for, I write them a nice individual e-mail with my resume pasted right underneath like the job sites say to do. Then I get excited and think about what I'd do if they called me, offered to fly me somewhere exotic for two days of interviews, think about what I'd wear and the people I meet. I think about how excited I'd be to tell my parents I got hired somewhere. I think about thanking my teachers for the great four years they've given me, because I'm going to have a fabulous life now at my new job. I think about apartment hunting in the city I'm placed in.

Then I go to my e-mail client to move the e-mail to my "Job Search" folder and see the list of e-mails I've sent this semester and the 2-3 replys (rejections) I've actually gotten, and I just stop. I just sit there. Not excited anymore. Not planning out what I'm going to wear or what I will say on the phone when they call me. I'm reminded that nobody gets good jobs by sending out random e-mails, it's who you know, and even if a company had a great opening why would they hire a new college graduate for it?

so I pop in a jill sobule cd and it's all kinda okay again.

This was my dream
When I was 13
And now that it's true
I wish I was you

You never followed your dreams
They're never what they seem
They're never what they seem

so I made her a skin. that's that.
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