him: hey, I thought you were going to be in the routing and switching class with me this semester.
me: I dropped it, I chose the six hour route so I can get the exit exam out of the way.
him: me too, but I'm still taking routing.
me: so how many hours are you in?
I sorta in the back of my mind thought about taking ten hours of grad school once, because I could GRADUATE IN DECEMBER if I did that. But something else told me it was freaking insane. In engineering grad school, nine hours is considered full time. Six hours is a normal load for someone working full time, and it's kicked my ass, but the way the courses were set up this time around I thought I could maybe sneak more than that in.
so the week before classes started I dropped routing, and just got ready to settle in for six credit hours like I always do. he didn't. he's outdoing me. not on purpose or anything, just... I'm super pissed that somebody had the organs to take ten hours on top of a full time job, and it wasn't me. I want to be the tough one.
so now I'm graduating in may, I hope. and this guy will, too, even though he started a semester later than me. It's too late for me to add the other class now, enrollment is closed. he said it's not even that bad so far, the lab schedule is flexible and the teacher is entertaining. I keep telling people about this, looking for assurance that I did the right thing. ms a said that grad school is like crack to me, so why feel bad about ending it early? I'll just go nuts in the spring if I'm not in classes. A May graduation party will be a lot more fun anyway... it's graduation time! fine, whatever.
Part of me is worried about next semester... what if the class schedule doesn't work out as nicely, what if something gets screwed up, what if I can't graduate after all? The other part of me is just so competitive I can hardly stand it. oh, he's working in an area where overtime is very doubtful, whereas for me it could kick in any time. he's got a kid at home and his wife doesn't work, so he has that non-working-spouse support help that I'm sure makes for an easier schedule.
I'm actually not sure what's worse... my complicated love/hate relationship with school? my jealousy towards everyone in the program with me? the fact that I still have serious issues understanding how to quickly plot a phase spectrum? i'm so doomed.