two weeks ago marc and I went out for a lovely dinner, got drunk and started talking about The Future again, and he brought up the fact that I hadn't told him my ring size and he didn't even know his and we should go look at rings. Because even though we're not getting engaged we have looked at bands a lot and have decided that before we do too much planning it'd be nice to buy wedding bands, because then there's some hardware to make it "official" (even if we aren't going to wear it).
the next day I got home from work and he's there asking if I'd like to go get dinner and go to the mall to look for rings, which I thought was funny because I didn't think he was toooo serious about looking right this second. and who wants to go to the mall in December anyway? I reassured him that I did not want to be That Girl who's pushing a guy towards major commitment, and he reassured me that he's not that guy who would let that happen, he's in this! we have that conversation all the time. it's a not-engagement. it's awesome.
so we go out to eat first, got some pizza, then go to the mall where we do laps around the food court because that's where jewelry stores are, and we stop and stand and stare at the people there and neither of us can take a step inside. too jewelry-like. too many diamonds. too not us. once again, we're faced with balancing our love for one another against our hatred for all things commercial and wedding-industry. we hate being "sold" this idea that love=diamond (because we know that idea stemmed largely from early-19th century de beer's monopoly propoganda, not anything real) and we hate the big "every kiss begins with..." jewelry MACHINES.
so we walked around the mall and talked about it and people-watched. then we went into third planet, this cool local hippy shop that sells anti-bush t-shirts, weird swords, and stainless steel rings with gheckos and planets. we went in, and tried on all kinds of rings. we showed each other the cool spinny ones, and the big quartz stone ones, and the carved ones. and we talked with the kid working there about what kinds of "tobacco smoking accessories" people are buying loved ones for christmas.
and that's how marc and I got our ring sizes.