Spacefem (spacefem) wrote,
Spacefem
spacefem

the heat

I've been in all these other worlds lately, I don't know what the deal is, my mind is just everywhere. Friday night I couldn't sleep and stayed up until 3 just watching TV, trying to clear out my head. it didn't work. even marc noticed today in the car that I seemed out of it, because we'll be having a conversation and suddenly I'm thinking about a song on the radio and the first time I heard it five years ago and how I was eating a lot of bagels back then, random crap like that, it's annoying. He asked where the hell I was and I wasn't even sure. ADD week, I told him, it's not you it's me.

but besides all that... we spent the day at a water park in derby, it was crowded but really nice. $5 to get in and there's a lazy river, you can grab a tube and float around in circles for hours. we watched the little kids in the kid pool, watched guys play water basketball, went down some water slides. just me, marc, divine ms A, laying around in the sun. marc says summer is his off season, he's not made for it, it's too hot. i'm not made for winter, it's too cold. I hate going out in the cold and being seen in ugly clothes.

here's the deal... winter people always say that the world should love cold weather, because if you're cold, you just put more on, but there are limits to how much you can take off in the summer. I think that's basically a load because in the summer you just sweat, that's all there is too it, and you drink water and deal. then the winter people tell me sweating is uncomfortable, and I tell them that clothing is uncomfortable, especially when layers are required. I never feel pretty in the winter, and my skin is always dry, and my hair is always staticy from the hats, and if it's below freezing my lungs downright hurt. there's nothing worse than that bitey cold feeling on your face, you know? it lives with you, you're permanently cold for three months, and in pain, and you get the flu and die.

in the summer, you jump in the pool or take a shower and bang! you're starting over! the sweat is gone, you're clean, you feel good, it's perfect.

I almost have marc convinced that summer is okay. he was out at the pool today, that was a big deal, before he came to be with me it had been ten years since he was at a pool. he likes summer music. he likes grilled hamburgers. all summer things. all my friends will come to the light side, in good time.
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