March 16th, 2003


it's my journal

So a few days ago, I posted an entry complaining about someone dropping me as a livejournal friend, and a few of you replied with the ever-present "It's your journal, who cares?" argument. Good argument. But I feel like discussing it further.

Spacefem's Guide To Why It's Not Really Her Journal
Life Is Compromise

Not really my journal. Not really your journal. Livejournal parallels life in many ways sometimes, whether we like it or not. One of these ways is in how we express ourselves. In online communication and in life, we are perfectly allowed to do what we want. But we also have to live with the consequences. For instance, we're totally allowed to treat everyone in our lives like crap. The issue comes into what we get back from it... if everyone hates us, and no one wants to spend any time with us, then it's not really worth it, is it?

Same with journalling. I've read tons of people say things like, "If this pisses you off, I'm sorry, it's my journal and no one is requiring you to read it." So true. But don't you want them to read it? Don't you want to get someone's attention? Aren't you always secretly hoping that you'll change someone's mind with that long, ranting post about political injustice or inappropriate social traditions?

Obviously, we don't write things just to satisfy the masses. That would be not only a lot of work, but it wouldn't be very satisfying. So there's line. There's always a line, between what you need for yourself, and what you have to do to keep everyone with you.

Journals and websites lives get pretty boring if everyone loses interest, just keep that in mind if you feel like going off on someone. There's always a relationship. Always a chance to change somebody's mind, if you're tactful about it. So really, the more you've got to say, the harder you'll have to work at being nice. If it was really your journal, it'd be done in pen, on a paper, on a book in your desk that nobody sees. When it's part of everyone else's life, they own a little piece of it too, just like they own a little piece of you.