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I saw The Hobbit

I liked the hobbit for Bilbo being awesome, and running around on gold. ending was certainly a bummer though. It's called "the desolation of smaug" so silly me thought we'd either see Smaug get desolated, or see Smaug desolate something else. We got to neither! Worst movie title since "Attack of the Clones", which really set the low bar for movie titles.

the "not arwen" elf girl could've used her own storyline instead of just being a wo- on a man. Like, she could have gone dwarf-healing just to stick it to the elf establishment. But no, it was her tender heart. Yawn.

if you see it though, take a moment to appreciate that the dragon is voiced by benedict cumberbatch. He did a good job.

whenever I hear a name as funny as "benedict cumberbatch" my mind immediately goes to engelbert humperdinck. AND THEN... Zingelbert Bembledack, Tringelbert Wangledack, Slut Bunwalla, Klingybun Fistelvase, Dindlebert Zindledack, Engelbert Humptyback, Zengelbert Bingledack, Vingelbert Wingledanck.

Well I can see this review isn't going to win any awards. Even forgot the spoilers Warning! But, Eddie Izzard. I win reviews!

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Comments

( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
athene
Dec. 30th, 2013 10:56 pm (UTC)
I've been listening to the BBC radio adaptation of Gaiman's Neverwhere. Benedict Cumberbatch is playing Islington. I almost melted at work when he started talking.
thesynergizer
Dec. 31st, 2013 04:45 am (UTC)
we didn't like it either. the second hunger games was much much better. i missed that bendy was the dragon though. wish i'd known that first, would have made all that boring cave stuff slightly more interesting.
browngirl
Dec. 31st, 2013 04:57 am (UTC)
You should see the contortions Bandercoot Clingwrapsnatch's name goes through on Tumblr.
lepid0ptera
Dec. 31st, 2013 05:22 am (UTC)
I had a much different take on ginger elf. I saw it less as tender-heart and more as dwarf-crush, and consequently I think of it as win for women dating shorter men! Unless she's really after Legolas, which would be disappointing.
ali_highland
Dec. 31st, 2013 09:12 pm (UTC)
The desolated scorched earth around the dragons lair is the desolation of smaug, that is where they were. Awesome Eddie reference though.
motorharp
Jan. 3rd, 2014 01:26 am (UTC)
I second the Eddie reference!
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )

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