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In America, within four days of having a new baby, a family is expected to make it to a doctor's appointment on time. This is a fairly cruel joke that society plays on us because it almost requires a dress rehearsal and no one tells you that but somehow we managed.

Anyway the pediatrician says Olive is doing great, she's lost 2.5 ounces but "gets" to lose up to 10% of her birthweight, which I figured up to be about 10 ounces (based on 6 pounds 3 ounces... I hate imperial measurement systems). And she had some good diaper events in the hours up to the appointment so we were meeting output quotas and he said since we hadn't seen meconium at least a full day, it meant we were winners.

quickie pro-tip... if you google "meconium" for the spelling do NOT click on the wikipedia article about it, there's a picture, totally disgusting.

I might meet up with the hospital's lactation consultants on Thursday or Friday, partially as a ploy to weigh the baby, but also maybe they can explain to me why this child latches on for 3-5 minutes and then declares herself done. Josie used to stay latched indefinitely, from what I remember. I also remember telling lactation this about her though, and having them not believe me because she was only a few days old. I also remember my milk taking an extra day to come in with her. Maybe my body thinks it needs to feed Josie, the hungriest child ever who gained a pound a week starting at birth, but I have a normal baby now? Hard to say.

Anyhow lactation told me yesterday that leaving breast really full of milk for more than, say, 24 hours, was not a good idea, and definitely not a good "game plan" because if it goes for days milk will just sit there and can get plugged up, so they told me to stop being silly and pump. So I did. 9 ounces of weird yellow newborn milk in about eight minutes, into the freezer.

I continued steps to keep the baby warm too, just in case. Last time I had a baby it was mid-June and 100 degrees and warmth was no problem, we could just go outside! I wonder if this child will believe that when she was born in MAY, her grandparents couldn't drive down at midnight because Kansas City was under a snow advisory? We're having a freakish spring. Oh but anyway I took a legitimately hot bath which I can do now because I'm not pregnant (that's so awesome!) and laid the baby down on a pad next to the tub so she could just be steamed, and we hung out skin-to-skin for a time.

Still had to pump today. It's my goal to be not pumping while on maternity leave, because who wants to be bothered with that? It's something you have to do while at work! And it's my goal to not have a giant freezer stash that I have to go hunting on milkshare to get to someone, if Wichita had a milk bank my goals would be different, but straight up person-to-person donation is a real pain to coordinate and the demand for extra milk is not as amazing as you'd think. I'm not saying it won't happen, just that I'm not TRYING to make it happen.

The only thing I'm declaring now is that I will not pump at night, because I don't want to encourage production during that time, if there's some chance this baby will sleep well I want to be able to sleep well too.

This wasn't an issue last night, Olive was restless starting around 1am, wanted to be awake and looking around or eating, but I'd napped during the day so I was fine taking her downstairs, hanging out in the rocking chair, and watching netflix movies. Also, staring at the baby. I think with Josie we were a little more strategy-oriented, I was telling a friend that every night we'd put her in pajamas and given her a bath and tried not to hold her as much or make eye contact or talk because we'd heard that all these things would make her sleep at night. Well, she didn't sleep at night, for 18 months. So if all that effort was for nothing, with this one I just don't care, especially not now, so I talked to her, looked at her, tried to memorize her tiny face because it flies by.

Yesterday Josie read her "ten shiny snails" counting book to me, counting all the snails correctly from ten on down, always getting the number right, and half the sentences because she's practically got it memorized and what she didn't have memorized she got the gist of based on pictures, she can name a hundred animals by now I bet. She's a person... slightly irrational and kind of small, sure. But I keep noticing her proportions now, how her feet are shaped exactly like our feet just a little smaller, her legs are sturdy, her hands can sort out her vast collection of beads into tiny boxes by color. I barely remember what her face looked like three years ago, when her hands didn't quite work yet and her feet couldn't keep socks on. I'd told Marc I wanted to have our second baby so we could get this "little kid phase of our lives" out of the way. But staring at Olive in the middle of the night, I felt like I was on too fast a train, one that had already left everything behind and was practically gone.

Comments

( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
sandokai
May. 7th, 2013 04:29 pm (UTC)

9 ounces... that's incredible!

thesynergizer
May. 7th, 2013 07:34 pm (UTC)
oh my goodness the end of this entry is something truly special and magical indeed.

the days are long but the years are short. sounds like you already understand this. <3
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )

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