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get physical!

yesterday i was sitting in my room feeling kinda, i dunno, uninspired about life again, when I decided to clean the place. So I dusted and vacuumed. Then I was uninspired again so I did homework. The I thought to myself, "Y'know what self? Last year at this time you were redecorating! And breaking up with a boyfriend! You had so many interesting things to do!" And I was right, it was time for a change.

I like my boyfriend now, but it's true that my room has looked the same all year. If I couldn't afford to re-decorate the least I could to would be rearrange the furniture, so I did. Started around 11 p.m. (you gotta do furniture rearranging in the middle of the night, it's just a neighborly rule)

It was nice. My computer now faces a window which is a bad idea because the glare is annoying, but I have a much better view of what's going on outside my door. My bed isn't against a wall anymore either, so Mom would be proud (it's sort of a dorm room convention to put beds against walls to save space, but it creates awful fung shui). The only bad thing was that I totally lost my microwave place, so it's currently under my bed. That's probably not good, guess I'll find out.

Today I woke up and piddled around on the internet for a few hours. Did breakfast with Dave. Felt guilty about missing church again. Mikey came over which was nice, I gave back his coat which was kinda funny because it's like 60 degrees out today. Then I got inspired again (i know!) and ran to the fitness center and lifted weights. Ran back. Felt good. sit-ups. I feel fantastic.

It was funny, there were all these track people there lifting too, it reminded me of that life used to have when my body mattered so much - when everything I put into it, did to it, thought about it, was crucial. I was one of the more minor atheletes so I had a healthy image of myself--there were girls on scholarship who coach put so much pressure on to lose wieght they'd eat nothing but ice cubes for days. But that wasn't me, I was healthy and basically happy. Didn't get injured. Wasn't the team drama queen. I was good at being invisible on that team.

There was one day, my freshman year, that I wasn't invisible, because I had a good day and did a lot better than anybody ever thought I could. Surprised them all. Showed them all. Proved I was good enough to be on that team. I was a different person then, and that was one of those days I was released from the body I had. High jumping is a funny even, there aren't many things that are just about making yourself fly. Most air sports lift you up first or launch you off a springboard or half-pipe or something, but not us, we were on our own and once you get to a point when you're really good, you really get your takeoff and approach and everything down, you learn what it's like to just be a flying creature. It's powerful. You are your own part of the sky.

But I digress.

The olympics last night were TOTALLY AWESOME! I decided that short track speed skating is like their hurdles - you can win just by being the only one left standing at the end, how cool is that? I love it. Also love that swiss ski jumper from a few days back who won two gold medals - not only an underdog, but totally cute, and I love seeing speechlessly happy people on TV. They push cameras in the wrong faces so often; parents who just lost a child, politicians who just lost the election, it's great to see someone on TV who is just so happy they're shaking, admitting that there are no words to describe how great the world is right now. Coupled with the fact that the swiss guy didn't know a whole lot of english, it just rocked.

Rememer a few years ago when Bengini (i think?) won all those acadamy awards for "Life Is Beautiful"? It was a great movie, BTW, and he was so happy by the second speech he said he wanted to "...fly to jupiter and make love to everyone". I love it!

I'm gonna go shower now, wash off the weight room nastiness. it's a beautiful day out, did I mention that? I love beautiful days, open windows, sunshine, coffee, music... yup :)


( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
Feb. 17th, 2002 06:45 pm (UTC)
Yes, rearranging furniture is only a night thing. And now that you mention it, perhaps my feng shui could be better arranged here. I might have to put that to work. You're fired for making my life more complex.

I, too, felt a little urge to get Out. I didn't do much, but taking a mile walk in 40 degree weather in a windbreaker just seemed like a good idea to me. And it was. I'd been cooped up in the house all day. Needed to get away from the puter. I needed it badly. You're lucky in that you have alternatives. And having a man probably helps, too.

I had the greatest smile on my face from reading your description of the Swiss downhill skier on TV. I don't have cable or get any channels, so I have no clue what's going on other than seeing what's on msnbc.com or cnn.com. To see the passion go from him thru you to me was inspiring to say the least. That might not make sense to anyone else, but it does to me. Isn't that all that matters?

And yes, the Life is Beautiful thing... that was fantastic! Robert Benigni (I double-checked- I bought the DVD) was incredible. If only the jaded movie stars were that gratious and appreciative... it would make for a far more exciting show, IMO.

I'm definitely with you there!
Feb. 17th, 2002 10:57 pm (UTC)
transferrable emotions... that's a very human thing, i think. nice.

Life is Beautiful is an incredible movie, but it was funny in how it made me feel. The first time I saw it I was just numb, like, "wow". I paced the hallway and looked at people walking by, in a totally different way, like I was far away.

The second time I saw it I just cried through the whole damn thing. I might cry again just thinking about it.

But life, in the end, is beautiful, it makes me feel that. So he got his point across :)
Feb. 18th, 2002 10:46 am (UTC)
there is hope yet!
it's very good indeed to see you commenting that life is beautiful! why qualify it with "in the end?"

nice weekend here in beautiful topeka as well........
Feb. 17th, 2002 08:53 pm (UTC)
I really wish homework was what I did when feeling uninspired. Instead I end up messing around in mine or Mark's room and doing stuff that isn't productive. I am glad you enjoy changing your room though. I have a roommate that prevents any major funiture moving to happen.
It was a great day here in Manhattan too! The only time I was outside, though was to walk inbetween dorms. This evening I insisted eating my Pizza Shuttle pizza outside just because I didn't want to miss the great day. Mark thought I was crazy. I guess I am, but in more crazy ways than that.
Your taking care of yourself by excersizing. Good for you! You will probable run circles around me when we get to be in our 80's because of it.
Feb. 18th, 2002 08:06 pm (UTC)
when uninspired
I grab a guitar... that's why I have too many of them. Or I sit at the keyboard and randomly play chords and stuff. Or I stare at a blank piece of paper until I get really pissed off and go do something.
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )

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