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friends

I have 47 friends. I got to thinking this today looking at my friends list and scrolling and scrolling and scrolling, I don't even know where I got some of the people, it's a mess. And I think to myself, I've had a LJ account since September, less than 5 months. So I add to my friends list, theoretically, 10 friends a month. Buy this time next year I might have 170 friends.

I feel bad that I can't keep up with all these. Who here has a solution? Do you just not read every entry? Cut some back? Limit who goes on your friends list? Don't give a crap in the first place?

In other news, there are some people who don't have me listed as a friend but they're on my list, so I guess those could be the first I'd cut out. My boyfriend would be one of those people, BTW :)

Comments

( 12 comments — Leave a comment )
skorobeus
Jan. 21st, 2002 11:34 pm (UTC)
Well I don't have friends, so it's not much of a problem for me. ;) Seriously though, I think we're talking maybe 10, 12 people. Not tough for me to keep up with. :)
friedtoast
Jan. 22nd, 2002 01:45 am (UTC)
*shrugs*

Cut off the people that you don't read their posts. I added you since you seems intelligent, interesting and you started posting on Sexi. But I don't really expect you to add me (even tho' I noticed that you had).

I feel better when you do, but it's not going to kill me if you don't. And even though others might be offended, they really have NO grounds to be offended. It's your LJ, you do w/ it what you wants.

Just my 1/2 cent worth
okoshun
Jan. 22nd, 2002 04:09 am (UTC)
I limit my list to those people who I know from a particular source, i.e. irc friends, RL friends. I have yet to have read a post from anyone else that I found interesting enough to add to my list. I've removed people from above said list who I felt posted too often about mundane things that I didn't really care about.

If I repeatedly read things from any particular person and think to myself "who the fuck cares about that anyways", then off they come. That's how I keep my list down.

As for why your boyfriend isn't on the list, I had considered not adding my husband to my list because I didn't want him to think that I needed to read his every thought via his LJ entries. But then I thought - me being on his list ain't going to curtail anything, so I added myself. It was an internal struggle, though.
spacefem
Jan. 22nd, 2002 06:58 am (UTC)
Dave and I read one another's journals, I'm just not on his friends list, I always poke at him about that one. I think it helps him get to know me. There are boards that I post on, however, that I've kinda asked him to avoid, saying I'd enjoy having a place where I can vent and know that NO irl people are getting wind of it. I thought he'd be that way about IRC for a long time, so I avoided #beos, but he seemed to feel differently.
daizylibra
Jan. 22nd, 2002 09:08 am (UTC)
My boyfriend isn't very happy about me posting on Livejournal. I'm kind of depressed, and he feels like I talk to "imaginary" people on the internet, more than I talk to him. Maybe he's right. Maybe I'm more comfortable that way. I see it simply as way to write down my thoughts, and to vent a little bit. It's almost therapeutic. He sees it in a different way, so I understand the "internal struggle."
skorobeus
Jan. 22nd, 2002 11:30 am (UTC)
Perhaps it's a trust thing? Maybe he thinks you will tell these "imaginary" people something he doesn't want them to know?

The journal is for exactly what you stated, writing down your thoughts and venting. :) That's why I use it, anyway.
fuxx0r
Jan. 22nd, 2002 01:19 pm (UTC)
I hate insecure males, and/or males who don't show trust in their Significant Others. They so often harm those who don't deserve it. No wonder I have so many non-male friends...I'm actually trusting of others...especially those close to me.
missniceness
Jan. 22nd, 2002 01:47 pm (UTC)
? Not Happy ?
How come your livejournal upsets your boyfriend? I mean if it makes you happy and it isn't directly detrimental to you relationship than he should have no reason to not support you. Now there's a chance that his feelings might be hurt if he feels that you would rather confide your feelings to 'imaginary interenet people' rather than him. If that's the case, just talk to him to set things straight. The best way to quell someone's insecurity is to show them that what they fear doesn't even exist.
spacefem
Jan. 22nd, 2002 02:34 pm (UTC)
i'm gonna have to go with everybody else who's posted and say your boyfriend sounds like he's creating issues. if you enjoy something, he should see it as good for you an encourage it. You need a life outside him in a big way, don't let a guy try to change who you are, you're healthy and normal and everybody needs to vent their thoughts.
fuxx0r
Jan. 22nd, 2002 01:23 pm (UTC)
Well, you have to keep me, because I help prove your life can't get worse than mine likes to be :)
I generally don't cut those who don't post often. I choose to cut those who I decide post to their journals uselessly or too often for what their posts are worth. My posts are not even daily, but they always say SOMETHING, even if it's just this week's reminder that I'm still alive. One entry a week wouldn't really constitute removal, but three a day...
I have 15 entries per page on my Friends section. If anyone takes up 1/2 of that and they're not a good friend then they must go. With my ~12 friends, I should NOT have to skip back a page.
One of my friends is me, by the way...it's a nice way to check if I have comments without loading 14 old entries.
blackorchid1
Jan. 22nd, 2002 01:38 pm (UTC)
I've only had a journal for a couple of months. What I find is that over time I realize whose journals I really read and whose I skip or skim over. I don't have nearly as many on my own list so I haven't deleted anybody yet but if I felt it was getting a bit much I would delete the ones I don't read or don't feel I have any affinity with.
fire_hazzard
Jan. 22nd, 2002 09:42 pm (UTC)
A solution?
The elipse.

If you click the elipse (...) that follows "update journal" you get the more detailed (and more often used) journal updater with things like mood and music choices. Well- there's an elipse link following the "friends" link too. If you click it, it will allow you to view a filtered version of your friends entries.

Go through and catagorize and classify your contacts kimmy... then selective reading will be much easier for you and you will quit missing my few entries ;)
( 12 comments — Leave a comment )

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